The Epitome of Motherhood Excellence: Kedra Calhoun Inspires Hands-on Action & Whole Hearted Love
Motherhood is one of those jobs that vary from person to person. There is no one size fits all job description. It’s non-stop work that changes at any given moment. We all do the best we can in ensuring that day to day responsibilities are tackled while implementing lessons and core values needed to raise decent human beings.
We are taught through our own upbringing, we learn from failures, we sometimes go at it blindly and often times question our ability to handle the beautiful chaos that motherhood throws at us. Every once in a while we will come across a woman who embodies everything we desire to be as a mother. One who wears the badge of motherhood proudly and selflessly places her kids at the top of all her priority lists to either push them to be and do better or to push herself to be better for them. Usually, we look to our own mother or mother figure for this inspiration but I found a super-woman who, outside of my own mother, is everything I desire to be as a mom…
♥ Kedra Calhoun, You are the Epitome of Motherhood Excellence and We Celebrate You ♥
I was blessed to speak to Kedra, mother of 2, about her experiences as a mother and asked her what/who inspires and motivates her do the worlds most difficult job so well. Read her responses below.
1. What changes (if any) did you notice about yourself after becoming a mother?
After becoming a mother I’ve learned the importance of patience, better listening skills, and caring for others.
2. What or who inspires your style of parenting.
My parents and maternal grandmother inspired my style of parenting
3. You seem more involved in your children’s day to day activities than many parents, why?
I am very involved in my children’s day to day activities. I feel this puts me in a position to better understand and teach them.
4. Do you discipline your children and if so what advice would you give other moms about discipline?
Yes. I do discipline my children. I stand firm on ‘when I say something, I mean it’. I am very big on my voice and my words.
The advice I would give to mothers is first, learn your child. second, find your voice and third find a sweetener. For example, with my daughter being the first born and I was younger, rules were more lenient. I was her mother and teacher because she didn’t start school until pre-k which created one voice at the time. So with her, when I need to get something across I use a higher voice or higher tone and kind of get louder when I need to get something across to her. Afterward, of course, the sweetener (being that she is older and decided that she wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up) I always tell her that your little brother is looking at the things that you do so you’re like the eyes when I am not around and she loves that responsibility. It makes her feel good and creates a great responsibility on both parts. Since she wants to be a veterinarian, I tell her, “you’re going to have to care for animals one day, you can’t act like this, you have to make sure you do right because you’ll have people and animals depending on you. Those are a couple of my sweeteners with her.
With my son, he grew up seeing what great behavior looks like watching his sister. My voice with him is much calmer but I respond with feelings. I get straight to the point and make sure I am clear. So I repeat things with him and asks him if he hears me and basically try to explain to him why. I also encourage him [through toys & special occasions] since he like toys. I will say “don’t you want to have fun, I do!
5. You seem really big on education and reading. Where did this come from and how do you incorporate the importance of it with your children?
I am very big on their education. This mainly comes from my experience as a child in school, I remember watching a lot of kids fail daily. Not just because they didn’t know how to do the work but because of behavior problems. I also remember being in classes with 25 plus students which I feel is too many for elementary and middle school.
I incorporate the importance of it with my children by making they are comfortable with it and understand what it is needed when they step foot on school grounds (or out of my door, period). I make sure I spend time in the class so that I can understand their teacher’s teaching method and the environment. Then, I create that classroom environment at home. I print of worksheets for them so that I can better understand how they are doing on assignments in school. We do work daily and read even though, (as a county policy) neither of them receives homework from school. I base my homework off of a weekly report from the school so that it aligns with what they are doing in school.
I am just scared to see my kids fail. I don’t feel like there is room for a teacher to tell me that my kids are failing. I feel like it’s something that we both should know at the same time.
6. I’ve seen you put little signs up for your children in the bathroom to prepare them for a day or to acknowledge a good day that they’ve had. When did you start doing this, why and what’s the inspiration behind it?
The bathroom signs I put up for my children started on my daughter’s 7th birthday. Because she had to go to school that day, I knew we would not be able to do much so I put my focus on when she woke up. The first place she goes to is the bathroom, so I decorated it. On each balloon, I wrote a word that I felt described her; pretty, smart, helpful and I referred to her as Dr. Alani (because she wants to be a veterinarian). The smile on her face that morning meant everything to me and that day I noticed that those words were a great day to start her day.
As adults, we often say each morning is a new start. Our Kids should get that encouragement as well.
7. Any advice to moms who “parent from across the room” and are distracted by social media, devices, tv, internet etc.. when it comes to their children.?
They should understand, that is the way their kids will learn as well. With two ears and two eyes working together, you get a clear understanding of what needs to be understood. The way a parent use their eyes to focus and their ears to listen to their children have a great impact on how that child will listen and communicate with others which is very important.
8. How do you feel when people tell you that you are their parenting role model and they strive to be like you?
It feels great when people tell me that I am their parenting role model and they strive to be like me. I am old school and I still feel it takes a village to raise our children and hearing that makes me strives to do better because there is always room for improvement.
9. Mothers often times are judged in everything they do. Are you judged by your parenting decisions, if so how do you handle the unsolicited opinions of others and what advice would you give other moms?
I am judged by my parenting skills. I have heard ‘you do too much” a couple of times and my response is, “I am working on better” and I say to myself, “If you [[they] feel like I am doing too much then maybe you [they] are doing too little”… learn your children and whatever floats the boat for your child, ride that wave. That’s what I am doing
Kedra, you are phenomenal. Keep doing what you are doing. Your children have one amazing mommy. Thank you for inspiring me and all of the moms around you.